The Driver

The Driver
(Originally published as a five part serial in March and April, 2008)

Synopsis: Vince Hutchins is in love with his boss’s Saturday night escort. Or so he thinks. This story twists and turns until we learn what drove them apart and if they can begin again. 

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Pulling the limousine into the diner’s parking lot, the driver smiled. The diner was quiet. Through the windows, he saw a few drunken teenagers and a couple of cops. Perfect.

“Will this do, Ms. Lamberton?”

“Yes, Vince. Thank you. Please. Come in with me.”

“Of course.”

Every Saturday night for more than a decade, his boss purchased her overnight companion services. When Vince took this job, the butler informed him that he would need to be available to take her home around two in the morning. Standing at the door, the driver watched the old man gave her a wad of cash, kissed her cheek and walked her to the door.

The old man was slowing down. And tonight, Vince reaped the benefits.

“Stay with her, Vince. Make sure she gets home safely,” the old man said.

For the last six months, he drove her home to her penthouse apartment near the Colorado state capital. He watched her hips sway until she was safely in the elevator. He’d return to his room in his boss’s estate with that image burned into his brain.

But, tonight was different.

Tonight, she was hungry.

She and the boss spent most of tonight drinking and dancing with Denver’s elite. She was a fixture at charity functions, galas, and parties where the old man introduced her as his daughter.
Everyone knew she was an escort.

She may as well have been his daughter. The boss never had sex with her. The old man said he was past all that heat. He simply enjoyed the company of a beautiful, articulate woman. Vince nodded as if he understood but for the life of him, he had no idea how any man could pass up the chance to be with her.

God, she was beautiful.

With her blonde hair up, as it was tonight, his fingers ached to touch the delicate curve of her neck and flawless skin. Tonight, her petite frame, and high breasts, were draped in midnight blue silk that showed every curve when she moved. His breath caught when she brushed against him stepping out of the car.

“This is perfect, Vince,” she said. “I wanted some french fries.”

“Yes, Ms. Lamberton.”

“Please Vince, call me Lily,” she said.

“Lily,” he replied.

He held the door for her then followed her into the restaurant.

She slipped her small hand into his rough palm then held on as they followed the waitress to a booth near the back of the restaurant. Vince, flushed from her touch, asked waitress for two cups of coffee then slipped into the seat across from Lily.

“Vince, I realize that I know almost nothing about you.”

“Actually, we went to school together … until I went away… to military school,” he said.

“I’m sorry. I don’t remember much of school.”

“I’m not sure how anyone could forget Good Sheppard and Sister Catherine,” he said.

“I do remember Sister Catherine.” She shuttered and he laughed.

“I was wondering….”

“Vince, you can ask me anything. I’ll let you know if I don’t want to answer.”

“How did you end up… like this?”

Her face lit up with laughter. Her sparkling white teeth and glowing pale blue eyes seemed to brighten the room.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I just remember you as a smart, sweet kid. I thought you’d be a lawyer or a doctor or a senator or something like that.”

“I came to this work honestly,” she said. “My mother was an escort.”

He was silent, hoping she would continue talking.

“I like my work,” she said. “I suppose Sister Catherine would have something to say about that. I enjoy the company of men.”

“What about the sex?” Vince asked, then covered his mouth with his hand. He couldn’t believe he said that out loud.

She laughed at his discomfort. She held her hand out across the table. Without hesitation, he reached for her warm pulse and soft flesh.

“My mother trained me to replace her,” Lily said.

“Were you molested?” Vince asked.

“Of course not,” she said shaking her head at him. “She started training me after she found out I was having sex with my boyfriend. ‘If you’re going to do it, you may as well do it well.’ That kind of thing.”

Vince felt as if he opened a long sealed mausoleum: private, dark, and silent. He ran his thumb over the soft contours of her hand.

“And?” She arched a shaped eyebrow at him.

“When was that?”

“Oh,” she said. She stirred cream into her coffee. “I lost my virginity the summer between junior high and high school. I was in love with a boy… absolutely head over heels. How about you? When did you loose your virginity?”

“A little earlier… in the backseat of a car,” he said. “I wish I could say I was head over heels in love. I was curious, horney but not in love.”

“Well, love is not all it’s cracked up to be.” Lifting a shoulder in a shrug, her face clouded. “I’ve never felt that way again.”

She looked up when the waitress appeared. Vince ordered a basket of french fries and a piece of warm apple pie. Lily was about to request ranch dressing for her fries when Vince touched the waitresses arm. He asked for the dressing. Lily gave him a long look and he shrugged.

“What was military school like?” She asked.

“It was good for me,” he said. “Lots of structure. I was supposed to go there after elementary school, but I begged to stay in Denver. One day they took me to the airport… just like that I was at military school.”

“Get in some trouble here?” She asked.

“You could say that,” he said. “I graduated at the top of my class then went to Annapolis. I was a S.E.A.L., underwater munitions, until I was injured about a year ago.”

“What was that like?” She asked.

When their eyes held, he felt as if they were the only people on the planet. He told himself that this was part of her service. Still, his heart filled with longing and he blossomed under her attention.

“Which part?” He asked.

“All of it,” she said.

“Annapolis was a fun, crazy time,” he said. “We partied hard, played hard, and studied hard. I lived a thousand lifetimes in those years.”

“And probably had a thousand women,” she said.

“Girls,” he said. Winking, he added, “The women came later.”

She laughed. Lily looked away from him, casting her eyes to the room.

“What do you see?” He asked.

“Nothing. An empty diner. I was wondering how to ask you if you were dating… married… attached.” She blushed. “I don’t usually ask that kind of thing.”

“I was married… right after college. It didn’t stick.”

“What happened?” She asked.

In a breath, his longing met his terror of being humiliated. His mind snapped shut at her question. He shifted away from her.

“Is this part of what the boss pays for? Interrogate the driver.”

She bristled.

“Take me home.”

She threw a couple twenties on the table. Even in four inch stilettos, she was half way out of the diner before he caught up with her. She turned her back to him when he opened the back of the limousine. She closed the glass between the compartments. With a sigh, he drove to her building.

“I’m sorry,” he said over the intercom.

“You need to remember Vincent Hutchins that I am not the one who left.”

She flew from the car.

Jumping after her, he reached the front door of her building just as she pulled it open. He pushed the door closed then, using his weight, he held the door closed.

“Please. Don’t go,” he said.

Her pale blue eyes raked his face. Letting out a breath, she shut her eyes to him. When her eyes popped open, they blazed with fury and pain.

“Whatever you think of me, I am not a whore,” she said. “I will not be treated as if I’m a common prostitute.”

He stepped back as if he had been slapped. His movement freed the door and Lily pulled it open.

Vince pushed the door closed again. Their eyes held.

“My daughter is waiting for me,” she said. “Please let go.”

“Your daughter?”

“She’s twelve now,” Lily said. “She’s asleep but she likes me to close her door when I get home.”

“You kept her?”

Letting go of the door handle, Lily squared her shoulders. Her eyebrows furrowed and her eyes squinted.

“You’d like to have this conversation? Here? On the street? In the middle of the night?” She sniffed. A single shaped eyebrow raised. “I’m not the one who is common.”

He took her elbow and led her to the front seat of the limousine. Without saying a word, he drove to the only place he could think of – the gazebo on the lake at City Park. The moon appeared from behind the clouds as they pulled into the parking lot. He opened her door and took her elbow. They walked in silence to the edge of the lake.

“I love this lake,” she said. “We spent a lot of nights right here.”

“Cuddling under the moon and stars, yes.”

Unable to look into her face, he leaned against the metal railing and stared at the dark water. In battle, he was strong and courageous. But in this moment, he would rather drown in the lake then face the pain in her face again.

“I saw your picture in the society pages of the New York Times when I was in Walter Reed.”

“Are you all right?” She asked.

“Yes. Let me get through this. Please,” he said glancing at her face. “I’ve been trying to say this to you for six months.”

She nodded.

“I was waiting for a physical therapy appointment when I caught a glimpse of your face in a discarded paper under one of the chairs. I asked an orderly to pick it up for me. Even with the surgery, I knew it was you.”

“Surgery?” She asked.

“New nose, chin, breasts,” he said.

She laughed.

“I’ve never had surgery. I just grew up.”

He pulled a tattered newspaper photo from his wallet. His thumb ran over the images on the soft news print. He gave the photo to her. She smiled.

“That was a fun night.”

“I stayed at my mom’s house for a week then I moved in with some friends. They helped me find the man you are standing next to in the photo. That’s how I got this job.”

Vince looked out across the lake as a group of Canada Geese floated by. Turning his head, he gazed at Lily. Her eyes shifted from the lake to catch his look. She leaned into him and he slipped his hand around her waist.

“Are you disappointed?” She asked.

“I get the jitters when you are around.”

She smiled as if the information delighted her.

“Do you do this to support…”

“Our daughter?” She asked. “No. I told you, I like the company of men. And I’m good at it. I’m popular enough, and wealthy enough, that I can pick and choose what I want to do.”

“What about love? Marriage? Children?” He asked. “It’s what you wanted.”

“I was burned at love,” she said. “No, I’m not interested in love.”

“Just money,” he said.

“I’d make more money if I didn’t spend every Saturday night with my father.”

“Your father?”

“He’s told you I was his daughter.”

Her soft smile increased as she chided him with her tone.

“I thought he was being polite.”

“He was my mother’s client and he’s my father. I look quite a bit like him.”

“He pays you every week,” Vince said.

“He gives me money,” Lily said. “I have asked him not to but he insists. He says that he’d rather give it to me now when he can see me enjoy it.”

Vince nodded. “Your father knows that I took this job because of you.”

“It figures,” she said. She was silent for a while. “What are we doing?”

Turning away from the lake, he faced her.

“I’ve never gotten over you,” he said.

“That’s nice,” she said. “You disappear leaving me to hold the bag and you haven’t gotten over me? You promised to marry me. We’ll do it together, you said. Don’t worry, you said. And whaa la, presto magnifico, he disappears.”

“I’m sorry,” he said. “My parents were waiting for me when I got home. They took me straight to the airport.”

“And you couldn’t write? Call? Fuck, telegraph?”

“I wasn’t allowed any outside contact for thirty days,” he said. “My mother told me that you ….”

“What did your mother say?” Her eyes became slits of burning rage.

“She said that you were pregnant with Bobby Harris’ baby and that I should have known that you were fucking him.”

“And you didn’t correct her?”

“I was terrified that it was true,” he said. “I was fifteen years old. I had no idea your mom was a… an escort. My mom said you were just like your mother.”

“I see your mother and father at mass every week,” she said. “They make no effort to interact with me or my child.”

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I blew it. I had everything I ever wanted and lost it all. When I was wounded….”

He fell silent.

Her ache to solve this riddle, to know once and for all, got the best of her. She turned to look at
him. With her eyes, she encouraged him to speak.

“When I was wounded, the moment the bomb went off, I saw your face,” he said. “Your name was the first thing I said after I woke from the coma. My wife heard me say your name and walked out of the hospital. She filed for divorce the next day. Your face, and those amazing eyes, haunted me day and night. When I saw the photo, I figured that it must be a sign.”

She stepped forward and kissed him. Slipping his hands under her coat, he pulled her body to him. He wanted her, all of her, right there. When she shifted away from him, he felt an almost unbearable yearning.

“What was that?”

“I wanted to know if you still tasted good,” she said. “And you do.”

“I’d like to meet my daughter,” he said.

“She’s amazing. She’s so beautiful, funny, smart. She has this look…” She looked up at him. “Yeah, just like that. She makes me laugh every time.”

“Does she ask about me?” He asked.

“She knows who you are,” she said. “Amelia has been waiting for you to come back to… Denver.”

“Amelia,” he said.

“Amelia Lily Hutchins,” she said.

“Lily?”

“It’s my middle name and my father’s mother’s name.”

He nodded. “You knew who I was when I took this job.”

“My father told me he had hired you,” she said.

“Why didn’t you say something?”

“What should I say? ‘Hi asshole. I know you abandoned me and our daughter but it’s great to see you.’ You expect too much from me.”

He crushed her mouth with his mouth. His lips pulled at hers as he feasted on her moist tongue. When she moved to break away from him, he held her in place. She sighed into him. Their heat rose like waves on the dark lake below.

She pushed against his chest and he let her go.

“Slow down,” she said. “I can’t move this fast.”

“Isn’t this what you do?”

She shook him from her. Stalking toward the parking lot, she opened her cell phone.

“Hi Sam,” she said. “Can you come get me? I’m at the City Park Gazebo. Oh, great. Thanks.”

“If you go, I’ll just follow you,” he said. “I want you back in my life. I need you back in my life.”

She looked at him and pulled the pin that held her hair. With a shake of her head, her blonde hair fell in curls past her shoulders.

“Who do you think you are?” She pointed her finger like a dagger at his heart. “By your choice, you aren’t a part of my life. You have no right to say anything about me or my life.”

A yellow cab screeched around the corner and come to a halt in the parking lot. An ancient cab driver hopped out of the cab carrying a baseball bat.

“I’m all right, Sam. This man is nothing.”

Sam opened the passenger door to the cab. Lily stepped in.

In a moment, she was gone.

Six hours later

When his shadow fell across the end of the pew, the child turned to look into his face. His heart stopped beating. Her eyes, so like his own, peered from her delicate and beautiful face. His heart jerked in his chest. My daughter.

“Is this seat taken?” Vince asked.

“Mom?” Amelia said to Lily.

“She likes to sit at the end,” Lily said.

“Great. I’ll sit next to her.”

Lily gave him a dark look, “You may sit over here.”

He tried to catch her attention but Lily’s eyes never left the empty pulpit. When their hips pressed together on the crowded pew, a pulse of her warmth reverberated through him. She shifted her hips away from him.

Feeling a slap at the back of his head, he turned to see his Army friend and her husband. She gave him an ‘it’s about time’ look. He wagged his eye brows then turned back to Lily. He was about to introduce them but Lily stared at the triptych.

“I’m sorry,” he said under his breath as the music started.

Lily ignored him.

Her father stood at the door when Vince returned last night. Lily called her father on the way home from City Park. Her father said that she was crying. He was furious at Vince for upsetting his daughter. Again. Unable to contain his own self rage, Vince vented at her father. After all, how could this billionaire allow his daughter to work as an escort?

They argued and accused each other. Finally, the old man poured them a drink. They drank and talked until nearly dawn. Vince dragged himself out of bed to sit next to her at mass.

The moment mass was over, Amelia ran to meet some children near the back. Vince leaned toward Lily but she bent away from him to pick up Amelia’s jacket and backpack. When Vince’s friend leaned over the pew to hug him, Lily walked into the aisle.

Her intentions were clear. Lily did not want to have anything to do with Vince.

“Go,” his Army friend said.

Scanning the crowd, Vince trotted down the aisle. She could not be far. He let out a breath when he saw her talking to a woman near the door. Moving through the crowd, he stopped just inches behind Lily.

“Oh,” the woman said. She curled her lip and looked Vince up and down. “Why don’t I call you this week?”

“Thanks Marilee,” Lily said.

Amelia ran to Lily for her jacket and backpack. Lily bent to kiss Amelia’s cheek then rubbed the lipstick off her pink cheek. Amelia hugged her mom, then ran after her best friend.

Trapped by Vince’s body, Lily whipped around to face him. But he didn’t move or notice her. He was staring at something. Following his line of sight, she bristled. His parents were making a beeline toward them. The look on his mother’s face could strip paint from metal.

“I….”

“My thoughts exactly,” Vince said under his breath.

With the slightest pressure on her elbow, he maneuvered through the crowd and away from his parents. Once on the sidewalk, he walked them toward his BMW sedan.

“I won’t be needing your services, today,” she said. “I prefer to walk.”

Vince smiled. At least she said something to him.

She gave him a scathing look then shook her elbow from his hand. With a flip of her hair, she set off on foot toward her home. He followed at her side.

“Please stop,” he said.

“No,” she said. “I’ve been hurt enough by you. I don’t really want my Sunday messed up by your bullshit.”

“I love you,” he said.

“So what?”

She walked off.

Jogging to catch up with her, he said, “Please. Ms. Lamberton. May I take you to lunch?”

She spun around to face him. She raised her hand and opened her mouth to say something. When she looked into his face, her shoulders sagged and her eyes filled with tears. Pinching the bridge of her nose with her hand, she pierced her lips then shook her head. She turned to walk again.
He caught her hand and turned her to him.

“What is it that you want?” She shook her hand from his grasp.

“I want a chance to start over.”

“Why? Why should I give you that chance?” She asked.

“Because you love me.”

“You imagine much,” she said.

Gripping her arms, he pulled her to him. Their faces were less than an inch apart.

“May I?” His lips brushed hers with the words.

She slapped his face.

Chuckling, he let her go.

“Against my better judgment, I gave you a chance last night,” she said. Her hand stabbed at the air.

“’Your baby needs her Daddy.’ ‘It’s been twelve years.’ ‘What do you have to loose?’ Papa said. And what do I get?”

She jammed her index finger into his chest.

“You insult me. Twice.”

“I’m a complete jerk,” he said. “I don’t have any idea how to make up for all that I’ve done to you. I want a chance to try. That’s all. Just a chance to try to make it up to you.”

“My father told you to say that,” she said. “You’re a complete loser.”

“Your father told me I would never get a chance to hurt you again. And you’re right, I am a complete loser. I lost everything when I lost you.”

“Why would I want to waste my time with a complete loser?”

“Because you love me,” he said.

“Love?”

She made a derisive face. Turning, she stalked toward her home. He continued at her side. They walked in silence until they were standing outside her building.

“Are you working today?”

“I don’t work on Sundays. I need a day to catch up on my life. Amelia spends every other Sunday at her best friend’s house. Marilee and I trade off.”

“And today?”

“It looks like I’m stuck with you,” she said.

Clenching her teeth for a moment, she smiled a kind of grimace. Their eyes caught and she let out a breath.

“Let me take you to lunch.”

“It would be better for me to have something here,” she said. “Would you like to come up?”

“Yes,” he said working to keep the ‘yippee!’ from his voice. “I’d very much like to come up.”

“You’ll behave yourself?”

“Yes ma’am. Scouts honor.”

She opened the door. While the concierge’s eyes scanned Vince, he made pleasant conversation with Lily. When they stepped from the polished marble floors to a sparkling gold elevator, the concierge picked up a telephone.

Lily inserted a key into the elevator control panel, pressed a button and they zipped to the
penthouse. He watched Lily’s reflection as she talked to herself. When the bell rang, she seemed to have come to some decision.

“The housekeeper is off on Sundays,” she said stepping off the elevator. “Want to see what she left us for lunch?”

He followed her into the kitchen. She opened a cabinet for a plate then bent into the refrigerator.

His breath caught at the sight of her round hips and tight behind. Ripping his eyes away, he stuffed his hands into his pants pockets shifting the fabric way from him.

She retrieved a container labeled “Sunday lunch” from the refrigerator. Pulling the top off the container, she found a rosemary chicken and mixed green salad.

“What do you think?” She asked. “Should we just order a pizza?”

Not trusting words, he smiled.

She moved the chicken to the plate then opened a drawer for two forks. She gave him a chilled bottle of Pinot Gris.

When he reached for a couple of hanging wine glasses, he glimpsed her face out of the corner of his eye. Her eyes were trained on his bulging pants. Her signal ignited him in one stiff spasm.

Her face shifted to neutral the moment she realized he caught her. She walked out of the kitchen leaving him to shift his legs to make walking possible.

“Let’s eat on the patio.”

She opened a sliding glass door to a sunny patio with a view of the snow capped Rocky Mountains. She set the lunch down on the patio table. He pulled out a chair for her and sat next to her. In an effort to slow his racing heart, he focused his full attention on filling the glasses.

“Do you mind sharing a plate or shall I get you your own?”

“I’m happy to share anything with you,” he said.

She gave him a genuine smile. Safe in her home, she was more relaxed and confident. She was also much more intimidating.

“Try this,” she said.

She offered him a fork full of chicken. He opened his mouth and she placed the chicken in his mouth. This simple gesture was so reminiscent of how they used to be. He smiled.

“Every single thing is perfect,” he said.

She flushed at the implication of his compliment.

“My father owns the building. Remember the beautiful building Mom and I lived in when I was growing up? When Amelia came along, my father insisted on taking care of his granddaughter. He pays for everything. You probably know this, but I’m his only child.”

“And your mother?”

“She lives in Florida,” she said. “You’ve driven her a number of times. She calls you ‘that boy’?”

“Oh,” he said. “I didn’t recognize her.”

“She doesn’t like you much.”

“I don’t blame her.”

They ate in silence under the warm sun. Vince was at a loss for what to say or do. He was certain that if he moved too fast he would lose her. He was lucky to even be sitting here. He sighed.
How to begin again?

“I’d like to kiss you.”

“I know,” she said. She smiled and looked at him. Her pale blue eyes searched the contours of his face. “I’d like a lot more than that.”

“Like what?”

“Ok,” she said. Squaring her shoulders, she answered his question as he challenged her to a duel.
“If you want a spot in my life, and my bed, you’ll need to get a real job. I’d like to get to know you again. No secrets. I’d like you to speak with your parents about me and Amelia, especially about Amelia. You need to be loyal to me, and only me. You must be faithful in every sense of the word. I’d like you to be a real father, not a playtime father or a weekend father, but a real father to Amelia.”

She stared at him in defiance then added in a quiet voice. “Maybe father another child.”

She clamped her lips closed as if she wished she hadn’t let that wish out.

“Anything else? Because I’d like all of that as well,” he said.

“Yes, I’m very sexual. You would have to be available to me if I want you. And, you’d have to be a much better lover than you were.”

He cleared his throat to keep from jumping her right there.

“I’d need you to stop working as an escort,” he said.

Her eyebrows shot up in surprise. She opened her mouth to say something but she was overcome with laughter.

“What?”

“I misled you,” she said. Arching a shaped eyebrow, she continued, “My mother was an escort. She wanted sexual freedom. You know breaking out of the whole good Catholic girl thing. I’m a doctor. A urologist.”

Vince nodded.

“I’m a little surprised my father didn’t tell you.”

“You’re in the company of men because you’re a urologist?”

Her eyes danced with merriment. She moved her fingers in front of her body.

“I spend my days with men’s genitals in my hands.”

“And you’d make more money if you didn’t spend Saturdays with your father?”

“It’s a big call night,” she said. “You’d be surprised how many weekend warriors injure themselves on Saturdays. Would you start a relationship with me if I was an escort?”

“Absolutely,” he said.

He fell silent, his mood shifting with her question. He opened his mouth, then shook his head.

“Are you offended? Because you deserved that.”

“You’re right. I do. And the name?”

She laughed.

“Sorry Grandma, but Lily is a whorish name. I figured it fit what you thought of me.”

“So you’re still….”

“Emily Lamberton, MD. Nice to meet you.”

In an effort to seal her humiliation of him, she held her hand out for him to shake.

“I think of you as Emmy.”

Her hand recoiled as if she had touched fire. The sound of his voice saying that name sent waves of warmth and terror through her. When she looked up at him, he was watching the mountains. Feeling her eyes, he turned to look at her.

“You’re mad.”

“I’m not. You planned this all along.”

“Six months watching the back of your head. Yes, I wanted to make certain you got just what you deserved.”

His head went up and down in a curt nod.

“What?”

“I remember going down,” Vince started. He let out a breath. “I remember going underwater, but that’s about it. I was mostly dead when they pulled me out. I don’t know why I survived. I just knew that I had to try to work things out with you. Escort? Doctor? Cannibal Chef? Lily? Emmy? Whatever. I had to try. I just wonder if there was ever a chance.”

Emmy squinted her eyes at him. She expected her plan to make her feel triumphant and superior. Hearing his simple and sincere words, she felt small and sad.

“I guess that sounds stupid.”

“What were your injuries?” she said.

She wanted to sound cynical and cold. When he flushed, she realized her words echoed with concern and caring. She cursed her lack of control.

“I don’t think anyone’s asked me that. Thanks.”

Standing he unbuttoned the top button of his pants then lifted his dress shirt.

“Oh my God,” she said. She didn’t bother to keep the horror from her voice.

“I was basically cut in two.” He pointed to the scars on his abdomen and back. “They fused my spine. That’s what gives me the most trouble now. I have a couple deep scars on my shoulder but basically I’m all right above and below the tear.”

“I don’t know what to say,” she said.

“Let me prove myself to you. Give me a chance to do what you asked.”

“You don’t even know me,” she said.

“I used to. I’d like to know you again,” he said.

Her silence ate at him. He watched fear, longing, and terrible hurt move across her face.

“Listen, I’ve pushed myself on you.” He tucked his shirt back into his pants. “If a relationship is impossible, I understand. I do. You need to make your own choice.”

Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out an ancient ring box. He slid the box across the table to her. She touched the box with her fingertips then looked up at him.

“Do you remember my Nana?” He smiled when she nodded. “She sent me her wedding ring just before she died. The note said: ‘There’s only one hand this ring belongs on.’ Like my heart, this ring is yours forever.”

Vince opened the sliding glass door. Forcing his legs to move, he walked across her apartment. Broken, he didn’t notice the concierge’s smug look when he staggered out of the elevator. As if by magic, he arrived at his car.

His mind screamed what his heart refused to believe.

He had lost her.

Loving her, and never knowing if it might work, was easier than knowing he had injured her beyond repair. He cursed himself for trying. Tapping the steering wheel, he wondered what to do now that his one reason for living was gone. He was almost to the highway when his cell phone rang.

“I am aware that today is your day off,” the butler said. “However, Madam Lamberton has requested your services. Will you make an exception?”

“Yes.”

“She will meet you outside her building in a half hour. Is your vehicle clean?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Good.”

Driving to her building, his mind screamed that she only wanted to play games with him. But his pounding heart whispered a different story. Seeing her waiting for him at the door, he jumped from the car to open the back door of his BMW sedan. She pushed the back door closed and opened the front passenger door.

“Where to?” Vince asked turning the car on.

“I’d like you to escort me shopping.”

“Cherry Creek?” he said.

“Yes. Is this your car?”

“Yes,” he said. “For the record, I have a real job. I work two twenty-four hour shifts. Tuesdays and Wednesdays. I drive for your father on my days off.”

“Great. You can afford to buy me a few pairs of shoes,” she said.

He laughed.

They fell into an easy rhythm. But she was always the easiest person in the world to be around. And Vince was a perfect gentleman. From shop to shop, he waited, ogled her choices, paid the bill and carried the packages. Like old friends, they chatted about nothing.

Emmy noticed other women making eyes at Vince. Wondering what he would do, she left him alone for a while. She watched him receive no less than four telephone numbers. After smiling, nodding, then making certain the women were gone, he tossed the numbers in the trash.

Leaning against the dressing room wall, she tried on the idea that he was sincere. Nodding at herself in the mirror, she knew what she wanted.

They were about a block from her building when she said, “Ok.”

“Ok?” He asked pulling into the drive.

“You can prove yourself to me,” she said. “But the physical stuff? I was just….”

“When you’re ready.”

She nodded.

“Would you like help with your packages?” He asked.

She shook her head. Now that this wasn’t a game, she was terrified.

He carried the packages to the concierge then watched her hips sway to the elevator. Their eyes caught for a brief moment before she stepped inside.

Listing her requirements in his head, he nodded.

He was not going to blow this chance.

Six weeks later

Lost in thought, Emmy turned into the park where Amelia’s team was playing soccer.

Emmy would see Vince tonight.

Twice a week, she waited outside her building. And twice a week, he swept her off her feet. Delectable dinners gave way to lingering trips to the art museum, quiet coffee shops or anywhere they could talk. One night, they rambled through Capital Hill Used Books. Emmy smiled. She hadn’t laughed as much in… well, twelve years.

At his suggestion, they picked topics for each date. His eyes never left her face when she explained medical school last Tuesday. She surprised herself by crying when he detailed the rigors of Navy S.E.A.L training. His lips brushed her tears away.

Tucked on his lap, with his arms around her, her life made perfect sense. They kissed, cuddled, laughed and cried. But her terror of being abandoned kept them from making love.

“When you’re ready.”

Emmy beamed. She was more than ready and still very frightened.

Checking her make-up in the rear view mirror, she nodded to herself. It was time for Amelia to meet her father. Carrying her lawn chair, she fell in step with another mother.

“Have you met the new coach?” The mother asked.

“No, I didn’t realize they had a new coach,” Emmy said.

“Amelia hasn’t said anything? My daughter won’t stop talking about him. He’s a great coach. Really good with the girls. And gorgeous,” the mother laughed. “Hell, I might divorce Jake just to take that man around the block.”

Emmy smiled. Her mind was too caught up in her own dilemma to worry about a new soccer coach. Setting her chair near the midline of the soccer field, she went to find her little girl. She found Amelia standing in a circle with her teammates. The team was focused on their coach, who was kneeling to talk to them.

Standing next to Amelia’s back, Emmy rehearsed what she would say. ‘Honey, when we’re done today I’d like you to meet someone’. No. I’ll tell her when I drop her off at Papa’s house. ‘You know that guy who drives for Grandpapa?’ No. ‘How would you feel about meeting your father?’ No.

“Ok Daddy,” Amelia said.

Emmy blinked.

What?

Looking over Amelia’s head, she saw the new coach for the first time. Vince. Feeling her stare, his eyes flicked up to her. Without breaking his instruction to the girls, he winked at her.
Emmy walked to her chair. She was caught between her delight that he was being a father and her anger for the secret. Each step mirrored an emotion: anger, delight, anger, delight. She plopped down in her chair.

“I know that look,” her mother said setting up her lawn chair next to hers. “Before you get too mad, you should know that Amelia is happy. She calls him ‘Daddy.’ Isn’t that sweet?”

Emmy looked across the field to see Amelia standing next to the soccer ball. Her daughter’s full attention was on Vince while he yelled instructions to her. Amelia nodded, then bashed the ball onto the field.

“Like her Momma, I don’t remember when Amelia’s been so happy,” Emmy’s mother continued.
Emmy shrugged.

“They see each other every day. He spends his work breaks with Amelia.”

Amelia jumped up and down when the soccer ball went into the net. In clusters around the field, the team hugged each other. Vince screamed for them to watch for the next play. The girls broke up and got to work.

“Plus, it’s Amelia who didn’t want to tell you. She wanted to get to know him before she had to decide if she hated him or not.”

Emmy looked over at her mother. Her mother lived Denver during Amelia’s soccer season. She liked to support her granddaughter’s liberated and “unladylike” sport. Emmy also knew that as her parents aged, the draw to be together was stronger than their need to be independent.

“How do you know all of this?” Emmy asked.

“Amelia told me,” her mother said. She cheered for the team. “I’m glad you’re wearing the ring, by the way. His grandmother was a lovely person. Lord only knows what created his awful father.”
Emmy gulped and looked at her left hand. She wore the blue diamond ring all the time except when she saw Vince. She didn’t want him to think…. She blushed.

“Don’t worry, honey, he knows what you’re up to,” her mother said. “Have you…”

“Mother!”

“Well, maybe you wouldn’t be so uptight if you did. He’s pretty cute in those little shorts.”

To get away from her mother’s solution to every problem, Emmy stood to cheer. She hooted and screamed when Amelia’s quick action assisted in another goal.

Amelia did look happy.

Crossing her arms over her chest, Emmy watched Vince run up and down the field with the girls. In her mind, he was just Vince. Vince, her childhood friend. Vince, her first love. Vince, the bastard who broke her heart. Just Vince. She wasn’t sure she’d ever forgive just Vince.

Watching him coach the soccer team, she saw a handsome man. His focus on the girls made him all the more attractive. She could love this man, this Vince. When the girls began to bounce up and down with the joy of winning, Vince’s eyes caught her eyes across the field.

She loved Vince. The thought hit her like a ton of bricks.

Oh shit.

“You know,” Emmy’s mother said. She was standing just behind Emmy. “I remember a girl who begged me to help her keep her baby. She said the baby was the only piece of him she had left. You remember being saddled with Amelia. I remember that you kept her so that Vince remained in your life.”

Turning to her mother, Emmy nodded slightly.

“You told me he’d come back to you. You said it over and over again,” her mother said. “Well, he’s here now, honey. Maybe you’ve punished yourself enough.”

“Punished myself?” Emmy asked. She turned to look at her mother.

“For loving him so completely.” Her mother smiled. “Have you ever asked him what really happened?”

Emmy shook her head. Her mother’s raised eyebrows spoke her opinion.

Amelia ran over to Emmy and she hugged her damp daughter. Excited about her team’s win, Amelia gave them the play-by-play as if they hadn’t been there. Emmy and her mother listened intently the entire way across the grass and to their cars. Emmy was just getting into the driver’s seat when Vince ran up.

“I’m glad I caught you,” he said. “I just found out that I’m not needed tonight. Your father has decided to make his own way to the airport. He’s going to be in Las Vegas for the weekend. I’m off until Monday night.”

“He and Mom take Amelia to Las Vegas for President’s Day every year,” she replied.

“I wondered if you’d like to go skiing. My friend isn’t using her cabin this weekend. I thought we could leave tonight and stay the weekend. Are you working Monday?”

Emmy shook her head.

“Think about it and let me know,” he said.

Her eyes wide, she nodded. He caught her hand as she slipped into the car. Leaning into her ear, he whispered what he said every time they parted, “I love you.” She blushed and got into the car. Sitting behind the wheel, she watched him run to pick up the rest of the soccer gear.

“Anything you’d like to say Amelia?” Emmy asked.

“No.”

Hello adolescence.

They drove to the penthouse in silence.

The next day

“Ready?” Vince asked.

Emmy took off down the hill.

Like they had as children, they chased each other down the slopes all day. They didn’t even stop for lunch.

Vince jettisoned in front of Emmy. Meeting at the bottom of the run, she skied into his open arms. Laughing, they fell over into a snow bank.

Emmy pressed off him then threw snow at him. Ducking flying snow, he caught her in his arms. Holding her arms to the side, he tried to kiss her. She moved her mouth away from him and he blew raspberries on her cheek.

The moment he let her hands go, she knocked him back to the ground. She pushed snow under his jacket. Laughing at her accomplishment, she kissed his lips.

“I love you,” she said as almost a sigh.

They both stopped moving. Emmy’s flushed joyful face to flash with fear. She swallowed hard.

“Very much. Yes. I love you,” she said. She pushed off him. “So you better….”

“What can I do?”

“I have to know….”

“Anything. Everything. What?”

“Why did you leave me? Why did you marry someone else?”

His face shifted to stone. “Let’s get back before it gets too cold.”

She moved off him.

He helped her out of her skis then carried their gear through the maze of ski resort shops and restaurants. They drove in silence to the charming one-room cabin where they spent the last night cuddled in each other’s arms. He helped her across the ice and snow, then carried their skis and gear into the cabin.

She was making hot chocolate when he returned.

“You won’t tell me,” she said.

“I couldn’t tell you… not in public… at the bottom of a ski run. I…. It’s not a very nice story.”

She set a mug of hot chocolate on the table for him. Nodding, he pulled out a chair and sat down. She sat next to him.

“We were at the City Park Gazebo. You said you would go home for dinner and meet me in an hour. You seemed so happy and excited,” she said. “I never saw you again.”

“My parents were waiting for me at the door. My father beat the crap out of me then threw me into the car. At the first stop light, I tried to escape. My father knocked me out… with a punch. They dragged me through the airport and forced me onto the plane. The rest is a numb blur. When I got to Washington DC, I tried to escape. I guess they were used to that kind of thing. I was held for thirty days. The first thing I did, the very first thing I did, was try to get back here… to you.”

Emmy watched his face. He seemed like he was miles away. His head turned to her and he smiled. He put his hand over hers.

“I spent the first year in lock down. I was escorted to class then locked in my room. I even ate in my room. My parents were my only outside contact. And I told you what they had to say. My father arrived the last day of school to drag me to summer camp. I ran away four times. I was caught twice and returned by the police both times. I spent the next year at school in lock down. That summer, my father put me in camp in the Dominican Republic. After trying to get off that stupid island for the fifth time, a camp counselor was assigned to me every moment of every day. One day, the counselor told me that my life would be easy if I just went along a little bit.

“I realized I might finish school and get back here. I would be eighteen by then so my parents couldn’t say anything to me. The next year, I worked my butt off at school.”

Vince stopped talking. He took a drink of his hot chocolate.

“What happened?” She asked.

“I’m not sure,” he said. “I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about it. About half way through the school year, I enlisted in the Navy. I never looked back. And I haven’t been back to Denver. Not a holiday, a wedding, a funeral… I have almost no contact with my family. Then one day, I see your picture and here I am. It’s like walking out of a fog.”

“Why does your father hate me so much?”

“It’s not you, Emmy. It’s me. I’m a big disappointment. I was supposed to be a priest. If not a priest, then an Admiral or a General.” Vince shrugged. “When I spoke to them about Amelia, they said that they ignore her because she’s my child.”

Emmy snorted in disgust.

“Right. They agreed to avoid you… and me. That’s the best I could do.”

“I always wondered why you spent so much time at my house. You only went home….”

“For dinner,” Vince nodded. “I was in worse trouble if I didn’t show up for dinner.”

“Did you love your wife?” Emmy stared at her mug.

“No,” he said. “I don’t have an excuse or even a reason for marrying her. It was like checking off the list to be normal: graduate college, get married, buy a house. She’d probably tell you the same thing.”

“Normal was so important?”

“Safe. Normal seemed safe,” he said. “We didn’t have much of a marriage. Except for about six weeks, I was on tour or in training or on assignment. She told me she would have divorced me earlier but she liked my paychecks. My paychecks were the bond that held our relationship together.”

He sighed.

“I’m not proud of my choices. I woke up on my wedding day, knowing that it was all wrong…. I remember standing in the mirror, buttoning my cummerbund, wishing you were waiting for me at the end of the aisle. But I was certain you didn’t want me.”

“Why would you believe that?” She asked.

“I never heard from you. I didn’t know if you were even alive. And….”

He twirled his mug on the table.

“And?”

“The Navy does a detailed background search. I told them I had a child in Denver. They said that I was not listed as any child’s father… in Denver or anywhere else. I figured you got rid of our baby and me.”

“Your father told me that they would fight for custody. The whore vs. the Catholic Deacon. The only way to avoid that nightmare was to leave you off the birth certificate.”

“Makes sense,” he said. “I know I keep saying this, but I’m sorry. I blew it.”

Emmy touched his face. Their eyes held for a moment.

“Just so you know,” Vince said. “My lawyer figured out how much back child support I owe. He set up a trust for Amelia. I know you don’t need the money, but maybe Amelia can buy a house with it or something.”

Emmy’s mouth fell open. Her heart jumped into her throat.

“You didn’t have to….”

“I know,” he said. “I want to be a real father to Amelia. Not because you asked but because that’s what I want. I used to lay on my bed at school planning what I would do with our baby. Of course, I thought we’d have a boy.”

“Tomboy?”

“Amelia is wonderful. She’s funny, sweet and tough. You’ve done an amazing job.”

Emmy blushed. Standing, she went to her bag. She pulled out four stacks of unopened envelopes bound by rubber bands. One at a time, she set them on the table.

“Papa gave these to me when I dropped Amelia last night. He received them in exchange for a sizable donation to that awful school. I wrote you every week until I graduated from high school. Three years. I never heard from you so I figured….”

Flipping through a stack of envelopes, she found the last letter she wrote. She tugged the letter from the stack and ripped opened the envelope. Her high school graduation picture floated onto the table.

While she read the pages, Vince picked up her picture. He smiled at her spirited hopeful face. Looking up, he took the sheets she held out to him.

Emmy went into the bathroom to shower. She had just finished washing her hair when, fully dressed, he stepped into the shower with her.

She threw her arms around his neck. He pulled her to him. Pelted by the shower, they held each other in a tight embrace.

“I’ll love you forever and ever and a day after that,” she quoted the final sentences from her final letter. “If you never come back to me, I’ll still love you. If you come back, you better be here for good.”

“I’m here for good.”

~~~~~~~~

claudia hall christian is a novelist. She lives in Denver.

Vince, Emmy and Amelia are secondary characters in the Fey novel series
where they continue to work on ‘happily ever after.’

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